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"Multi" is my favorite color and I (DC) love to mix ideas. People are complicated systems, so only one view of our problems leaves out many dimensions that could help speed relief. This is why I work closely with Tracy Maxfield, a neuromuscular therapist, energy worker, and dancer. Tracy and I combine concepts once thought to be separate: neuromuscular therapy and family systems, dance and attachment processes, therapeutic movement and EMDR (eye-movement desensitization and reprocessing) therapy. We learn from each other's very different approaches and our clients benefit. Blending multiple elements in therapy allows us to address a person's distress from the perspective of the body, its sensation and pain - and the less visible aspects of emotion, story, and thought.
Anger & Heart Health: Anger Wisdom, Part XVI
Anger & Heart Health Let’s dive into how anger affects your heart health. Most people misunderstand the anger/health relationship, because most anger research we tend to hear about has focused on limited aspects. Just do a Google Scholar search and notice what you...
Anger Work De-Stress Now: Anger Wisdom, Part XV
Deliberate, controlled anger work helps people de-stress and feel better, immediately. Anger De-Stress People are stressed out right now. They feel the stress of the pandemic and the seeming hopelessness of our political circus. I hear people say: I can't believe so...
Empathic Anger: Anger Wisdom, Part XIV
Empathy+Anger=Empathic Anger Empathic anger rises up in us when we see someone else being mistreated and we feel outrage on their behalf. We want to defend the person, protect them. Mirror neurons make us naturals at feeling the pain of others. I remember this most...
The Myth of Selfish Anger: Anger Wisdom, Part XIII
Selfish Anger? I recently saw a church flyer advertising its curriculum to help members deal with their anger. The minister quoted Frederick Buechner who called anger one of the seven deadly sins. “To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past . ....
Physical Anger Release: Anger Wisdom, Part XII
Getting Physical with Anger (in a good way) In my last post, I introduced physical anger work as a tool for getting grounded. I gave instructions on how to deliberately release anger in a time-limited way using props, such as a punching bag or pile of cushions, a bat,...
Anger at Myself: Anger Wisdom, Part XI
But what if I’m just mad at myself? I nearly always get this question from my clients. Who are you most angry with? I ask. 75% of the time, the answer comes back: I feel anger at myself. Angry with myself for not knowing better Mad at myself for thinking I could...
Scary Anger Dissociation: Anger Wisdom, Part X
Dissociation Makes for Scary Anger I know you: You don’t want to hurt anybody, ever. But you grew up around someone who behaved irresponsibly when they were angry. You’d prefer take it out on yourself than be anything like that person. That person showed scary anger...
Anger Grooming & Dominance: Anger Wisdom, Part IX
Dominance and Whiteness Twenty years ago, I had an experience that demonstrates anger grooming, gender, and power in conservative White U.S. culture. I taught a required diversity course to graduate counseling students, right here at Missouri State. One week, I...
Anger & Forgiveness: Anger Wisdom, Part VIII
The heart wants to forgive. No matter the offense or the offender, we desire the release of letting it go. Our need to forgive is universal and I believe clear, grounded anger bridges us from hurt to forgiveness. In other words, when we feel angry with the other, we...
Anger Grooming & Dissociation: Anger Wisdom, Part VII
“Angry People” So here’s where anger gets really complicated. Not only do we dissociate in response to anger triggers when we fear being angry . . . we numb our anger based on heavy grooming that starts as soon as we’re born. My client, David (not his real name),...
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