Beyond Studio makes me appreciate my wild inner self. The one inspired by my favorite aunt. You know that aunt of yours . . . the one your parents didn’t want you visiting because you came back from her house wanting to sleep outside in your hammock and you wore your plaids and dots together … Continue reading Visit Beyond Studio and Nurture Your Inner Crazy Aunt
Narcissistic mothering is not a happy subject. But sometimes we need to call it out, label it, protect our daughter-selves from narcissistic influence, so we can let it go and move forward into the beauty that lies ahead. When your mother thinks you’re her . . . When your mother sees you as all the … Continue reading Help for Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers
Lessons from Linde I recently took a road trip with my sister and her kids. While we drove and swam and hiked and visited, I got a good dose of anti-depressant wisdom from my five-year-old niece. Linde inspires me because she is full of joy and incredibly herself: no apologies, no pretense, no matter what's … Continue reading Joy Lessons from my 5-year-old Niece
Imperfect Parenting We're imperfect parents, but we so want to get it right. Am I providing enough security? Am I being consistent? Will he absorb my disappointment in myself? Will he absorb my anxiety? Am I telling her enough of what she needs to hear? Will she be self-conscious like me? We try to … Continue reading Relax and be an Imperfect Parent
I have a few Negative Beliefs . . . I did some dumb things in my teens. I backed the family car out of the driveway, into our neighbor’s car (which had exited his driveway a second ahead of mine). I waited tables at a church banquet and spilled iced tea down the back of … Continue reading “I’m unattractive & I Don’t Deserve Love”: Change Negative Beliefs with EMDR
Spring brings rebirth and color and joy. It also brings pollen, tornadoes, and allergies. My life transitions like the seasons, and even though it scares the crap out of me, I know it’s a good thing. Something gets stale, stuck, or sour and I know it’s time to think differently. I get an urge … Continue reading Transition and EMDR: No such thing as a wrong turn.
Your higher self knows how to calm you. We all want to find calm receptive mode. But not everybody wants to get a massage (although we should - there are people who can make us feel safer and less awkward). Some of us need action. We need to be out in a kayak or running … Continue reading Calm Receptive Mode: Get calm and find the good stuff inside you.
Holding On & Letting Go You know, that feeling where you remind yourself to worry? Lately, I catch myself holding certain issues with a death grip; things I can’t control. My loved-one’s health habits. The world’s poverty and greed. Our mass addictions to technology. Someone else’s parenting failures. My child’s future direction. I catch myself … Continue reading EMDR, Worry, & Letting Go
Resistance is Being Fully Me Without Shame Sitting in the parking lot at a local Christian college, I wait for my son to emerge from a music festival and I observe other people and their cars. the young guy in his baseball cap, zooming behind me, not watching for children the mom in the … Continue reading Lessons in Relational Justice, II: Resistance = Love = Self-Respect = Vision
What is Relational Justice? I just watched Michael Moore’s (2016) film, Where to Invade Next. It's all about Relational Justice. In the two-hour movie, Moore visits eight countries to steal good ideas and bring them back to the U.S. He also raises some questions that have been with me all day. What caused our country … Continue reading Lessons in Relational Justice, I