Lessons in Relational Justice, I

What is Relational Justice? I just watched Michael Moore’s (2016) film, Where to Invade Next. It's all about Relational Justice. In the two-hour movie, Moore visits eight countries to steal good ideas and bring them back to the U.S. He also raises some questions that have been with me all day. What caused our country … Continue reading Lessons in Relational Justice, I

Be More Self-Centered and Save the World

What does it mean to be self centered? Your Self is your wise spiritual center. But outside this center, we live under a weighted blanket of stress and uncertainty, threatened by darkness and greed from all angles. We feel disconnected from neighbors and afraid of people on the other side of the philosophical aisle. 18% … Continue reading Be More Self-Centered and Save the World

Transform Holiday Stress into Mindful Rest & Giving

Until recently, I resented the holidays. As in, Already???? We just did this, right? Except the years when my son believed in Santa and we put together tricycles and trains, after his bedtime, under the synthetic Douglas Fir, I got a sinking anxious dread just before Thanksgiving that let up after January first. Holiday stress separated … Continue reading Transform Holiday Stress into Mindful Rest & Giving

The Air We Breathe: Panic, Mental Health, & Misogyny

, Woman-Hate=Mostly Unconscious Fear of Women’s Empowerment. One day, in 1992, I had a panic attack. It came out of nowhere. I got up early and dressed for work, made breakfast and started a load of laundry, turned on the morning news while I finished my hair and my (ex) partner snored peacefully. I stood … Continue reading The Air We Breathe: Panic, Mental Health, & Misogyny

Affirmations for Healing Spiritual Abuse

  Spiritual abuse includes any kind of religious teaching or practice that diminishes your human rights, isolates you from the wider world, or systematically places you in positions of low power. I modeled these affirmations for healing spiritual abuse on those found in Jessica and Nick Ortner’s The Tapping Solution courses. Say them aloud or read … Continue reading Affirmations for Healing Spiritual Abuse

“I’m not creative.” 17 Signs of Artistic Abuse

Artistic Abuse What is artistic abuse? Creative expression heals. Everyone has an inner artist. When we nurture the inner artist, we heal. Artistic Abuse (or Neglect) is communication (direct or indirect) that discourages, shames, or minimizes a person’s creative self-expression. Artistic abuse affects us emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Art saves lives . . . or at … Continue reading “I’m not creative.” 17 Signs of Artistic Abuse

Leaving Home to Find My Higher (Grownup) Self

I Write to Grow Up I struggle to differentiate, as we all do. Leaving home is a lifelong process, as described by Murray Bowen, the father of family systems theory. But writing my novel, Wife Material, about the process of leaving home, catapulted me forward. That’s why I so recommend life-writing as part of trauma … Continue reading Leaving Home to Find My Higher (Grownup) Self

Snap out of Trance and De-Zombie-fy (I & Thou, part 2)

I've been watching people turn into zombies all week in couples therapy. One woman said, I shut myself down so I won't have to strangle him! Trance-induction is complicated. It robs us of moments, but it helps us avoid feelings we don't want to have. And sometimes it keeps us from committing homicide. Why do we … Continue reading Snap out of Trance and De-Zombie-fy (I & Thou, part 2)

Differentiate and Help your Parents Grow Up.

Depression and Stuckness Lately, my fifteen-year-old tells me I am too rigid and he no longer believes in anything I believe in. It makes me a little weepy to hear this, but it challenges me to let go of my pre-planned images of how he would grow up. If I tried too hard to control … Continue reading Differentiate and Help your Parents Grow Up.

Investment in Healing: Why Pay for Therapy?

Hello, I think I need some therapy..... How much does it cost? When can I expect to feel better?....... Will I need therapy for a year? Three years?....... Why won't you take my insurance?............ Investment in my health?????  We call in distress, needing help now. Yet, we worry about the time and expense of therapy … Continue reading Investment in Healing: Why Pay for Therapy?